Lessons Learned

One morning when I had time to spare before going to work, my younger son Gabriel invited me to play with him in their playroom. (My boys refer to their bedroom as playroom since they sleep with us.) Since I normally do this with both my kids on weekends, I went along, but brought with me a just delivered catalog to browse through. There he asked for some of the smaller toys that I kept out of their reach in high shelves. After handing him his choice, I turned to the catalog. Gabriel interrupted me and asked for another toy. Once more, I gave him his request and went back to browsing. After a while I noticed that something was different. Where before I heard him pretending and talking as he played, it was now quiet. Turning to look at Gabriel, I saw him quite morose, his nose running. I motioned him to come sit on my lap, which he did, and wiping his nose, asked him what the matter was. Suddenly he started sobbing quietly and tears ran down his cheeks. Alarmed, I tried to placate him, but to no avail. Carrying him, I brought him to his mom to whom I had no answer as to why our normally playful child was crying his heart out. It took some time for us to calm him down with both our undivided attention, but he never did say what was wrong.

Looking back, I think, Gabriel probably had his good cry because I was ignoring him. As we would say, naawa siguro sa sarili dahil hindi siya pinapansin. Nakakakonsiyensya. This made me resolve to be really attentive to my sons when spending time with them. That is unti the next couple of days when the little tyke started making a habit of crying and generally being difficult for no apparent reason at all. Napipikon na niya kahit mommy niya. Lessons learned. Gabriel had learned that his unexplained crying can be enough reason for us to give him our full attention; while we now know we must moderate our reactions to our child's demand. Time to move to the next lesson then.